20 minutes is all I need


IMG_1991I’m taking a friends advise to give myself a time limit to write, edit and publish. Bam done. Don't look back.

So I picked 20 min. Because 20 minutes has always been magical for me.

When I learned to meditate the instructor said it takes about 20 minutes for your mind to calm down and for the chatter to slow, so I meditated for 20 minutes only, and I felt better.

When I was recently divorced, a single mom and totally lost a friend told me to move my body and so I decided to run for 20 minutes only. I kept this habit up for 2 years everyday and I felt better because of it.

And now to get myself to go to the gym I tell myself that I only have to show up for 20 minutes counting from when I step into the actual gym, not when I step onto the elipital machine, and more often than not I end up working out longer than 20 minutes.

I think I could do anything for 20 minutes, that time seems doable, not too short and I can always fit it in my day.

I’ve been in a writers bog lately, and it’s been difficult to write something that I feel like putting out in the world. But I keep trying because there is a deeper experiment that I am exploring of what happens when I show up and do the work even when I don’t want to?

I’m finding that resistance is what shows up in the form of a critical censor, and the more time I have to think, or stew the more stuck I become.

But I am encouraged by podcasts, books, and blog posts of creatives that have gone through this process, and it seems that resistance is the thing that happens before every great moment.

So I’m trying to embrace it.

I have made two creative commitments since the beginning of September, to write a weekly blog post and create a lunch note for R every day that I have him.

The lunch notes are going great, I love that I have 15 minutes to create them, that they are inspired purely by our interactions, that I color horribly and don’t give a fuck, that he shares them at school and finds out what they say by asking a teacher, that he recites them back to me “keep your eye on the prize R”,

and even that he is sad when he loses them. It is a fun bond that we share, it is for him and it is for me, and so I am never blocked when it comes to creating them.

No time to think, no time to care, and always positive feedback from R. Always.

1 minute left to complete this blog post.

The mind is a great thing but you can think your way out of everything. From now on 20 minutes to create whatever it is I’m wanting to share. 20 minutes to put together this blog click publish and be done with it.

20 minutes is all I need.