What do you Care about? And Why does it matter?
Value is in the heart of the beholder. More often than not value is perceived, not calculated. It’s irrational, intangible, unpredictable and messy. The customer is not paying for the rare beans or even the tasting experience— she’s paying for the joy that believing the story brings her.
Value creation is the responsibility of the marketer. It’s our job to give people stories to believe in, not just advantages to measure.
When we are talking about creating habits that will have meaning and worth to us, we must first establish what we value. Not what we THINK we should value, but what we really care about.
Getting honest with what the the ways that we want to be treated, the world we want to surround ourselves with and the lifestyle we are aiming towards will both help us in going after the things we want, but also help us know who is NOT our audience and also where we will always run into conflict.
Personal Story: In my 1rst marriage there were many moments where I should have seen that my values didn't line up with my ex's.
In relationships I value family, creating roots in one location and having lots of quality time together, spending money on experiences and enjoying life. This was not in line with my ex's value of freedom, adventure and frugalness so we often fought about my unwillingness to travel to 3rd world countries and live a nomadic life and his perception that I lacked passion and adventure.
While I tried to compromise many times on these issue to bridge the gap in our marriage our differences in values made it difficult to move us forward in our goals. In fact it kept us stuck and unable to move forward.
Hign sight is always 20/20 and I can see now that being in a relationship with a man who shares my same values makes being in relationship so much more fun and joyful because we share the same vision of the life that we want to live and the goals that we want to achieve.
When thinking about our values its sometimes easier to look at the relationships that we have and see where there is ease and flow and then also notice the relationship are full of conflict and struggle. Do your values line up?
There isn't any judgement when it comes to what we value. Much of this comes from our upbringing and the people who have influenced our lives.
When I first learned this idea of values and was sharing more and more about my creative work I was surprised to meet people that simply didn't share my same value of creativity as a way of life. It was a harsh realization to learn that some of my closest friends didn't share my same value, because it was something I felt so passionately about.
But, as you will learn there are people that are you PEOPLE and will cheer you on and support you throughout your journey and there are other people in your life that you love that just might not share in this same value as you do. That's ok, not everyone you love has to share in the same values as you do in every arena.
For example, I love my husband, but the creative world is simply a place he doesn't understand or play in. But he wholeheartedly supports me in this journey because its something I love and enjoy and that he wants that for.
So why should you care about discovering what you value in terms of this creative endeavor?
In terms of this creative work and project you are working on
Your WHY: tells you your Trajectory your BIGGER what you are aligning with.
Your Values: bring intential meaning towards your intended trajectory
I Want_____ because it make me fee____and is inlign with my Value _____.
Sparks Project: Putting it all together, plan of experimentation.
In this week we will go through a number of different exercises to help clarify why this is such an important thing to know, not only in this class but in your life as well.
Its sometimes helpful to think of what we value in another person
Why they are important? Values are what we believe to be important about our world. We immediately connect with people that have shared value systems, and relationships thrive when our top values align.
Personally in relationships I have been on both sides of the coin, and when your values don't align its much harder work to get to a place of common ground.
Values also help us when someone just doesn't get what we are doing, or they can't see your vision, it helps us know that those people are not our people. No judgement, just different values.
I invite you to do this work because I think knowing what we value can help us say No to the things that we don't want to do, and Yes to the things that light us up.
Also, in this course it will help you in our final project to practice making sure that your values line up with your WHY that you are working with.
What do you value in a relationships with a partner?
Honesty, Dependability, Intimacy, Humor, Adventure, Thoughtfulness, Kindness, Communication
What do you value in a relationship with a friend?
Honesty, Dependability, Humor, Connection, Depth, Communication
What do you value in a relationship at work?
Honesty, Dependability, Humor, Thoughtfulness, Communication, Kindness
What do you value in a relationship with your mother?
Dependability, Kindness, Thoughtful,
How can we think about them on a daily basis?
Knowing your values is essentially boiled down to what you will say YES to and what you will say Hell NO to. Another ways of looking at this is thinking about intution, common sense, ect.
What we value is really about what is most important to us at the end of the day. And what’s great is that we have already been living our life in accordance with our values so its just a matter or defining it in our OWN terminology and putting it front and center.
For me: I value Authenticity, Truth, Trust, Dependability, Accountability, and Family. Not Necessarily in that order. In short I value honest, genuine, trustworthy, nice, kind, funny, and sweet people in life, if you are those things you are most likely a friend of mine.
For me to feel really good in ANYTHING that I am doing, I have to feel like all those pieces are being taken care of.
It maybe to think of your values in that way of thinking about a person that you love deeply, what sort of characteristics do they hold? Do you see similarities in other people in your own life?
Knowing what we value in life, in business, in our creativity, can also help us refine our Why that we talked about earlier.
If your why is “how can find my true inner calling?” and your values are authenticity, faith, and joy. Then maybe your Why becomes “what do I do well in my life that is already speaking to me, and how can I express that in a way that honors my faith and helps others?”
Tradition- to follow respected patterns of the past
Wealth: to have plenty of money
Power: to have control over others
Virtue: to live a morally pure and excellent life
Commitment; to make enduring, meaningful, commitments,
Comfort: to have a pleasant and comfortable life
Fun: to play and have fun
Contribution: to make a lasting contribution in the world
Acceptance: to be accepted as I am
Genuinesness: to act in a manner that is true to who I am
Knowledge- to learn and contribute valuabel knowledge
Realism: to see and act realistically and practically
Purpose: to have meaning and direction in my life
Challenge: to tak on difficult tasks and problems
Accuracy: to be accurate in my opinons and beliefs
I value my alone time and workout time
I value my creative time
I value the solid, real, authentic, friendships I have.
PDF: Values exercise: What is important to you?
I value my time, days off, time with my kids, being able to get up in the morning and have my routine and then start my day.
The Foundation and starting place is always coming back to our Why and what we value. If we get confused or lost along the way, which we will talk about in a few weeks, its always important to come back to these core building blocks.